Tuesday, December 12, 2006

Identity...

Count me among the mothers that often has had a hard time separating my identity as a mother from my identity as a female. For me they have always felt one in the same. After my divorce my identity became my children. I was "a single mom". That was who I was...the end all be all of it.

Things have changed. I am married to a man who pushes me to be ME! Not just the mom me, but the WHOLE me. I have missed out on parts of myself. I have not explored all there is to me. I am an extremely creative person. I have left all that creativity dormant for a long time. Jason has been my biggest cheerleader in discovering who I am, even when he doesn't know he is doing it.

One area this is really evident is school. I have eluded many times to the fact I was having issues deciding about school. I have always intended to finish out college. Jason is the first person to say, "Yes, you need to get a degree you can use and yes, we have kids to consider, but what do you WANT to do?" I had always thought of what I should do. Or what would be easiest on everyone else.

I am happy with my life. I love my kids, my husband and the life we have made together. I am just really excited about adding some more contentment to that life. Some contentment with myself. I want to tap into my creativity more...I want to live authentically to who God created me to be.